2 states, story of my marriage

Book- Review: 2 States, story of my marriage

Author: Chetan Bhagat (CB)

Reviewer(FAN) : Dhruv Joshi

Charming, refreshing and enjoyable; these words come to mind quickly as I sit to review the latest book by Chetan Bhagat. There is a possibility that I may have a positive bias about the author, as I also belong to the clueless but confident breed of young MBAs!! However I have tried to reduce that bias to the extent I could.

The book opens with a sweet love story, moves through enticing descriptions of the relationships and ends at the macro level note of a unified India. CB’s ability to make concrete observations on the society has always grown better with each of his book. To give a deeper perspective on this, may I remind the readers that his first book, was a story of an individual with very personal set up and incidents. One night at call centre struck well with a particular section, larger than the one in his first book. Three mistakes – considered not so good by many- had some sincere and responsible remarks on the riots, passion for cricket and the entrepreneurial drive of young Indians. And the latest one opens even wider in terms of the scope and study. The following line from the book proves my point; “TV is the biggest boon for dysfunctional families” this shows the understanding of the author.

CB has also acquired an uncanny ability to relate his characters with many bigger issues, eg. In present book he almost covers all conceivable characteristics of people we find in our society. Though good at pointing the macro level issues his writing is not bereft of the personal touch and warmth. One of the most beautiful of all those cutely personal descriptions is expression of his desire to be an author, many of us personally relate to it to a great extent.

Ananya and Krish are the lead characters of the novel, they portray the ethical and moral dilemma of young generation of India. Though the story seems to be in sometimes in 1990s, this dilemma is still as astute as mentioned in it even today.

Their parents reflect the dilemma of a different order and nature. The episodes of the Minti’s wedding showcase the youth power against the ancestral and traditional autocracy. One point we, as youth, should not miss here is that the octogenarians (older people) are not against us or mutually exclusive to our thoughts, aspirations or desires. They are just a bit slower in adapting to them, understanding them. Who can forget that when everything ran out, it was Krish’s father – an old rigid and irresponsible man as described by Krish right from the beginning – who played a heroic stroke to salvage the ship of his son’s almost doomed love life.

We need both the types of unity that this novel brings, the obvious one is across the whole nation. And the not so obvious but a subtler one in terms of the generations.

I’d end on the clichéd but relevant quote,

United we stand……

POST SCRIPT: CB’s ability to create amusements, humour and tickle the reader is also appreciable.

Researching........

Once I heard someone saying that the most soothing sound to human ears is that of his own name. Indeed so many of us scribble our own names at the back of our register in free time (even during lectures!). We relish the thought of our victory, strength, advantage, goodness and of all possible virtues. We do like to love, praise and aggrandize ourselves, do not we?

Confusion comes when one tries to examine this natural ego, self love a bit seriously. One of my friend said to me that even our acts of help to others stem from basic need of satisfying our own ego.

In light of these confusing arguments, I would like to put just one question to all.

When was the last time you genuinely helped someone?

What was that act motivated with?

Answers are welcome, in case you do not find it right to post it on blog, mail it over…

Cricket.......

Participating in any sports sincerely teaches one most important thing, which is Sportsman Spirit. While it is true of all the sports, my experience comes from cricket as cricket is the sport I sincerely and passionately indulge in.

After a long break I got a chance to play for my class cricket team in an interclass cricket tournament. In the beginning of the tournament we were one of the weakest team on paper. By the end of the tournament, surprisingly we were the champion side.

One of the friends, while commenting on our performance said “you people played seriously”. Some of my teammates thought of this remark as rather derogatory, however I realized that this was actually one of the best compliments our team could ever get!

In all the matches, we reached the ground at scheduled time, each time our captain took some decision everyone followed it with great precision. Whereas other teams were late in coming to the ground, fighting with each others at times.

These small and rudimentary details may look very trifle, but in the end they impact the whole game in a huge manner, we learned this in a most enjoyable manner.

We struggled a lot, with umpires, unfair opponents but we were determined not to lose. This determination came from the vision of our captain, and was shared by the whole team.

We lost an important player before the tournament began but what we did not lose was the commitment to the cricket and the discipline that it directs.

In one of the matches we were given a raw deal, we were asked to bat under the bad light. Even when the match began the opponent team wasted a lot of time, forcing us to bat under bad light. That match was a true test of character, mental strength. The opponent was a seniors’ team so they played with rules, not the game!

In the end we went on to win that match, most dominatingly. From that match we learned to play under external pressure, doing our job well even if things are not going right with you.

To me, this thing is even more significant than victory, because in life too there will be raw deals thrown at you, people doing wrong things to you. In such cases the ability to do our job in most right and efficient way determines our mental strength, character and courage.

I am thankful to our team for this wonderful learning.

A new learning...

October : Days- 3

September: Days- 30

August: Days- 31

July: Days- 31

June: Days- 18

Total days- 113

It was 114^th day today, here in Delhi. However in some aspects it was a first day.

• First time I saw a movie, in a multiplex here.
• First time had a taste of (deeply craved) local road transportation service.
• It was also a first time I was hit for sixes in New Delhi, (it feels bad to be at receiving end!!)

I do not intend to praise myself but it was perhaps the first day when, for so many hours at a stretch, I did not think of studies at all!!! (Quite a record I guess).

The movie I saw ended on a line which struck to my mind. It said that “at times, in order to be focused we tend to isolate ourselves from the rest of the world. Tough as it is, we must need to draw a line between the Focus and Isolation.

Surroundings and the individuals who form those surroundings are also a great source of learning. I deny the submission of an individual identity just to gain the group identity, however it is of great importance to be able to be a part of a team. Good as one may be, one should never be an ivory tower in any aspect.

On another stroke of thought I admire being slow and selective in striking friendships, however the pace of this process needs to be adjusted according to the environment and people around you.

For this learning, I am indebted to some of my friends. It would be judgmental of me to say anything about any of them. However the only thing I am compelled to say today is that it is these people; who are instrumental in reminding me of the world, the existence of which I had forgotten for the quite some time now. And the fact that this belongingness and bonding come with our difference in opinions, way of living, temperament, stage of life being still as intact as they ever were, makes me feel proud of all my friends. (Democracy is truly a fantastic force!!!)

A close friend had once said, friendship is accepting people without judging them.

I now understand a bit what the friend had meant years back, when this was said.

Gandhiji’s gift to me

It may sound strange but apart from his invaluable gifts of Satya, Ahimsa and an unwavering faith in the goodness of the humankind there is one more gift that Gandhiji has given to many of us. It is the gift of a connect with many other in the world.

Let me elaborate, last year I had met a foreigner who had come to the visit of Sabarmati Ashram. Having met this fellow I realized that our thinking on Gandhian thoughts and practices was enriching for both of us. Surprisingly we had a lot of similarities of views on many things. This, to me, represents the ability of truly good values to transcend geographical boundaries.

I became friend with this foreigner and our exchange of ideas on many things related to Gandhiji and relevance of his ideas in today’s time continues even today.

This connection would have not been possible without the common bridge of thoughts and ideals. I feel quite lucky to have borne in a country which produced the man like mahatma who still help us cross all borders, walls, restrictions and limitations to communicate and reciprocate the true spirit of love, life…..

Mrityunjay - The victory over death

The true victory, it seems, lies after all possible insults, criticism, deprivations and mortification. (My observation after reading Karna's Biographical novel, Mrityunjay by Shivaji Savanth.)

YOUTH

I went to the shop bought some things and just as I was showing it to a friend he said that I had paid a rather exorbitant price for that useless thing. I felt bad; it was certainly not the first time. I thought to myself that the whole world is in the business of cheating and swindling! Had I been granted one wish, I would surely finish that scoundrel shopkeeper who cheated on me.

This is one thing, which has increased tremendously over the last few years. More and more people have acquired the expertise of cheating. The domain is not only limited to a select few nowadays! However if that is the way people behave and we need to put up with them, then what is the whole problem about?

The problem, I believe lies more within than outside anywhere. And it is a problem of perception. A famous philosopher Plato once said that “Of all animals the boy is the most unmanageable, inasmuch as he has the fountain of reason in him not yet regulated.” This fountain of reason throws up various arguments that are always contrary to the way of the world.

The pitiful thing is that the whole world seems to be on one side of the shore and we on the other. This also inflicts certain fear of isolation and autarky however the youth is not deterred by it.

Friends!

I was fidgeting with my cell phone thinking whether to call this old friend of mine now or not. It had been long time till we met last, and I had no clue about his routine, there was a high risk lest my phone may disturb him in some work. Deciding not to call up my friend I resumed reading. A few seconds later there was a phone on my cell, and it was the same friend!!!!

Does the above paragraph seem familiar, only then read on!

I consider myself extremely lucky to have found friends in some of the best individuals at all the three places, Bhavnagar, Ahmedabad and Now in New Delhi. However there are always some questions regarding friendship that perplexes me whenever I think on this subject.

· Is it true that as we move ahead in life we lose the ability to make good friends?

· Is it true that one needs to put in deliberate efforts in making friends or is it a natural process like the growing of a flower that should be left on its own accords?

Do think of the answers to these questions, I will also be thinking, and hopefully soon upload them.

When Sabarmati Meets Yamuna

“It is not compatible with the water of Sabarmati which is running in my veins”, I had said these words to one of my new friends in New Delhi who innocuously offered me a drink. It might have looked a bit pompous and haughty of me but in such matters I don’t mind being explicitly blunt. I am against the excessive chauvinism of one’s own region however a strong attraction to one’s own regional identity becomes all the more expressive when one moves out of one’s state. One of the reasons to come to delhi was to get the adequate exposure to develop a national perspective and outlook.

This objective seems to be well on its way. I miss Ahmedabad a lot, but just to compensate myself a bit I keep reminding myself that if not Sabarmati, I am now at the brink of Yamuna. Yamuna is also as important and beautiful as Sabarmati has always been. I am yet to see the flip side of Yamuna, (having seen floods in Sabarmati in 2006-07) I fear what Yamuna might have in store for me during my stay here.

Looking at the issue in a slightly metaphorical sense, I had also thought that the rivers, in early beginning of civilizations, generally built the nature of life of people. Following the logic it was safe to assume that people in this part of the nation also were very much same as the ones in the other parts. Their likes, dislikes, nature, fears, enjoyments and preferences were all quite similar.

As a child we always hear that India is famous for Unity in diversity, perhaps it is this link of similarity as human beings that binds us.

A poem of Anguish

Conscience aches when one says, one will,

-Take a stand, that one knows, is difficult to keep,

and one can’t.

Conscience aches, when one sees around

Just to find people flaunting away happily,

The rules that are to be followed with rigour.

Conscience aches when one speaks,

Unheard always……and hears all that

Oppose all that is taught to be true and good.

Conscience aches when one doubts,

The god whom one loves so dearly.

In a quandary, whether to curse or to laud, the god,

For what he is and what he is not.

FOR All good teachers...

Nani Palkhiwala wrote for a teacher “The issue of his sustained mental effort is not a volume but a man; it could not be embodied in print, it consists in the living word.”

Such a sustained effort can only be a result of a genuine passion.

Therefore the quality that makes an ideal teacher is the passion for teaching. My teacher used to say, “That what you remember, after having forgotten all that was taught; is true learning. A true teacher will always appeal to your heart. An appeal to the heart can never be forgotten.”

Genuine passion ensures good communication, enthusiasm and continuous improvement. Moreover this quality makes the teacher sensitive to the needs of all types of his pupils, his teaching gradually becomes appealing to different types of students at different levels of understanding, thereby doing justice to the whole class consisting students of varying capacities and interests